September 10, 2008
Which is why The Wife and I are heading to Charleston, SC this weekend to catch Ron White's show. Yep. Should be a real cultural event.
We've got a hotel near the convention center for Friday night, and then Saturday we're staying with an old friend who lives in the area.
I've never been to a big comedy show like this. Do they serve drinks? Are the drinks a ripoff? What about food? If I go to the bathroom, will the show be playing over a loudspeaker or anything? How awesome would it be if I could get a picture with him? Would it be as awesome as a post that consisted entirely of questions? Hmm? Would it?
Posted by: shank at
11:11 AM
| Comments (1)
| Add Comment
Post contains 174 words, total size 1 kb.
September 09, 2008
Oil continues its bearish trend on demand concerns and the strengthening dollar. As far as the dollar is concerned, I think we're seeing a confluence of factors. Firstly, the Euro-zone may have started to get a little worried about the power of the Euro. If it got too high, it would have exacerbated some growth concerns by hindering exports. Their central banks may be intervening a little to help weaken their currency to a preferred range. Secondly, I think many international investors look to the US for financial stability; for better or for worse. Our economy does seem to be more resilient on its face than many others; so some folks might be tentatively getting back in the water.
The government effectively nationalized Fannie Mae and Freddy Mac on Monday. Personally, I was suprised by all the enthusiasm (on Wall Street and in international markets) for this move; apparently they all read it as a stabilizing gesture. A very interesting turn of events, but not exactly a surprise; as those two organizations essentially have a promise from the Federal Reserve that they will exist into perpetuity. What happens from here is anyone's and everyone's guess. Literally; everyone is guessing. Hopefully we'll see some kind of hybrid setup where some mortgages are auctioned off and privatized while others remain on the federal balance sheet. At least that way the tax payers don't end up footing the bill. God and anyone who has ever heard of the budget deficit knows we've already been handed a pretty hefty tab. Thank you, government. Sigh.
Also- something interesting for you conspiracy theorists. Yesterday morning, someone mistakenly(?) re-released an article from '02 or '03 about the bankruptcy of United Airlines. This news hit the trading floor, and United's stock went from $11/share to about 99 cents per share in mere minutes. With about 126 million shares outstanding, this represented a loss of roughly $1 billion. Trading on the floor was halted at this level. Once people started to see that the media release was in error, trading was reopened and by early afternoon the stock value was back up in the $10-$11 range. Everything's hunky dory right? I mean, if I held my shares yesterday, it was just an average trading day? Well, yes and no.
The sleight of hand here is in the shares that were traded. Let's say you've got 1000 shares ($11000) at 8am. The market opens, you're at work, things go down the shitter and your sell limit kicks in at $6. You've just lost $5000, and you won't know it until you get home that evening; or possibly later. Now, say a day trader or hedge fund sees this going on as it's happenening, and decides to take a gamble at 99 cents per share, and buys up everything possible before trading is shut down. Let's just guess that they were able to invest $5000 (approx 5000 shares) before the door was slammed shut. Over the next few hours, the truth comes out, and trading resumes. The trader sells these shares in the afternoon for maybe $10 each, turning five grand into $50,000. Nice.
This situation, as you might imagine, has many people demanding the SEC look into who found and released this article, and what their connection is to the investment community. Did United push this out there through a company shill in an effort to drive the price down, so it could snap up shares and sell them later; generating a vast amount of cash for itself? Or was it one of the many powerful but teetering investment banks that did it, to help shore up losses in their real estate portfolios? Or, was it just a giant fuck up? Only time will tell, if ever. The facts as they stand now are that someone was buying at 99 cents; and whoever it was, they're probably feeling pretty good today.
Posted by: shank at
12:57 PM
| Comments (8)
| Add Comment
Post contains 674 words, total size 4 kb.
Posted by: shank at
12:27 PM
| Comments (3)
| Add Comment
Post contains 76 words, total size 1 kb.
September 08, 2008
Shank has no North Carolina updates; I suspect he has no power.
Ted in Virginia reports nearly six inches of rain and some basement leaking.
Posted by: Victor at
07:25 AM
| No Comments
| Add Comment
Post contains 82 words, total size 1 kb.
September 06, 2008
Rain. Lots and lots of rain and Nic reports a neighbor was out in this rain, poking around the foundation of his house. Poor guy.
I took the dog out for a walk and that was the fastest she's ever peed and pooped in her life. She's not real fond of the rain, either.
The rats are asleep in their cages and apparently don't give one of their own asses that Tropical Storm Hanna has decided to pay a visit.
I'm in the basement in my little corner of the house, converting cheesy 80's vinyl to MP3...snaps, crackles, pops, and one skip (so far) intact.
Oh, and I'm drinking a little beer. But unlike Shank's swill, I drank something Nic's cousin brewed a couple of months ago and just one of 'em made me rather numb. So either he's brewed it really strong or he's poisoned me.
If I'm not in the hospital in a few hours I'll switch to something better.
Posted by: Victor at
01:28 PM
| No Comments
| Add Comment
Post contains 209 words, total size 2 kb.
The stupid cat, however unfortunate, is still alive. God when will some wild beast take her away.
Winds are gusting, rain is not yet falling in steady patterns (for more than 10 minutes). I thought for sure we'd be getting pummeled by now, but apparently Hanna is a bigger bitch than we all thought.
That's right. You travelled thousands of miles just so my redneck ass could refer to you as a bitch.
And when/if Ike comes ashore (thank god in his now weakened state) we can all take turns making fun of mother nature. Oh come on, don't get sensitive. That's how we roll baby.
Posted by: shank at
01:35 AM
| No Comments
| Add Comment
Post contains 115 words, total size 1 kb.
September 05, 2008
Hanging with the neighb's right now, having a good time. The Wife is still knocked the fuck out. Worst migraine she's had since she was a kid.
Posted by: shank at
07:17 PM
| Comments (1)
| Add Comment
Post contains 82 words, total size 1 kb.
The first squalls are beginning to pass through the area. If you've never been through a hurricane before, the first bands come through very fast, almost as fast as a car driving past your house.
The neighbors have stocked up on all the supplies neccesary for a low level Cat 1 storm (beer, batteries, scotch [DAMMIT, I knew I forgot something. Fuck. Oh well.], and beer). There's even talk of a mid-evening cornhole matchup. Don't really see that happening, but where there's enough PBR, there's a way.
Looks like Ike is firming up his plans to do South Beach; which I think won't be too bad. He's not a 4 like he was yesterday, and maybe passing over the islands will slow him down further.
The low pressure system is exacerbating The Wife's migraine tendencies. She just muttered something about how childbirth can't possibly hurt any more than this. She's pretty nauseous.
I'll post again later on.
Posted by: shank at
12:52 PM
| Comments (1)
| Add Comment
Post contains 167 words, total size 1 kb.
September 04, 2008
The 'H' in the center of that dot on the coastline stands for 'House'. As in, "This is shank's house". Of course, Hanna is merely a dress rehersal for Ike, who's furthest (and thankfully most unreliable) forecast shows him making a northward turn before Florida. Ike's already a Cat 4:
Hopefully this will not be a 1-2 punch for us; but the truth is that if Ike makes landfall anywhere, it will be one hurricane too many.
Posted by: shank at
09:03 AM
| Comments (3)
| Add Comment
Post contains 81 words, total size 1 kb.
September 03, 2008
UPDATED: Below the fold.
Well, the NHC's most recent cone runs right over my house. Which isn't really saying much, as that stupid cone has literally blanketed every coastline south of the Chesapeake at some point in the past two days. So yeah, I'm not exactly filling the root cellar or anything.
A lot of the public advisories I've read aren't calling for it to become anything more than a very slight Cat 2 storm; there just isn't enough ocean between her current location and the coastline to fuel any real growth. I'm glad for that, since a Cat 2 storm rarely does any more damage than, say, me after drinking a whole bottle of Lagavulin single malt. It's really just a whole lot of noise, pissing, and partying.
As the storm moves closer and develops further, I'll be able to make decisions on what preparations to make. If I stay, I'll attempt to live blog it on Friday night. Debating a drunkblog though, we'll see how it goes. The last thing I want to be when a limb comes through my window or crashes through my roof is fair to middling and three sheets to the wind. more...
Posted by: shank at
09:24 AM
| Comments (3)
| Add Comment
Post contains 252 words, total size 2 kb.
August 18, 2008
Let's see, decreasing demand in America, the end of fuel subsidies in China, and rapid global deflation* equals what? A decrease in the price of oil in the face of a Gulf Coast hurricane. I claim victory and my righteous place as economics seer of the year.
Unfortunately, such pronouncements not only have the contrarian effect of dooming me to any forseeable future success in these markets; but they also actually ruin any chances I ever had of claiming some sort of social life.
The upside is that I shorted a market that was at $145, and it ended at $112 today. Too bad the money I made will never be enough to fill the void that keeping up with this ridiculously volatile market left in my already depreciated character. Good Lord, I am such a loser. more...
Posted by: shank at
10:24 PM
| Comments (217)
| Add Comment
Post contains 539 words, total size 3 kb.
August 15, 2008
Car shopping is probably the only kind of shopping I enjoy, or even tolerate. For someone like me, car shopping is a journey years in the making. I generally don't prefer brand new vehicles, as their high prices and immediate depreciation make my bunghole pucker. However, when I know I'm going to need a new car in the coming three years, I'll peruse the current new models so that I know what will be on the used lots when I'm finally ready to buy. If you drive it while it's new, you'll have a baseline to compare it to when it's used. Plus, there's the no-strings-attached test driving.
Lately, I really like the 2008 Acura TL Type-S
. Of course, for that to drop into the price range I'm comfortable with could easily be three years. The '07's are still in the high twenties.
I thought briefly about the BMW M3, but quickly dropped that idea for two reasons. One, I don't think they come with 4 doors; and two, I may be a prick, but I'm not nearly the prick it takes to drive an M3. Of course, there are still a variety of 3-series sedans which can be had for the mid twenties with low mileage. That I could go for, but there's something about a BMW that makes my reliability gauge waiver. I'm just not sure they've got what Toyota or Honda do.
Speaking of Toyota, there are some very nice IS models out there. I remember when these first started coming out about four years ago. They fall perfectly into the sporty sedan genre. I was very close to buying one when I bought my prelude, but they were a little outside my range. NOw they can be had for the low twenties all the way up to the high twenties depending on model year.
The spoiler for all of this, though, is that none of these cars are all-around better than my current vehicle. The Prelude handles better than all of these sedans do. It gets better mpg than all of these sedans do. The only two areas where it fails are power (175hp vs the mid-200's these sedans make) and space. Lack of space is a fairly weak argument, since the Prelude has four seatbelts, so I could put a child seat in the rear.
Of course, it also doesn't help that the Prelude is paid for with only 63,000 miles on it. Which means two things:
1) It's a 'free' vehicle
2) No one will ever pay me what I think it's worth.
The autophile and the miser inside me are muddying the waters. The issue has become far too nebulous for me to make a clear choice. I suppose I should take that as a sign that it's not buying time yet. Sigh. I suppose I'll just keep window shopping until an ultimatum surfaces.
Posted by: shank at
11:57 AM
| Comments (5)
| Add Comment
Post contains 533 words, total size 3 kb.
August 13, 2008
Posted by: Jim at
03:39 PM
| Comments (6)
| Add Comment
Post contains 12 words, total size 1 kb.
August 11, 2008
On the other end of the spectrum, we have Kerri Walsh. As if Women's Beach Volleyball needed the ratings boost. Thank you sweet baby Jesus.
Gymnastics, for all it's prancing, arm-lifting, ribbon-twirling flamboyance; is a staggering display of atheleticism. I tried gymnastics when I was in middle school. It lasted until we got to the rings, and my instructor noted, rather nonchalantly, that if we swung incorrectly we would dislocate one or both shoulders. I was like "Oh hey, um. I was just looking for something to do between soccer seasons, so I'm just going to ah, bow out at this point...given the...that um, the idea of two simultaneously dislocated shoulders made my balls shrivel into my abdominal cavity. So, ya'll have fun." Those people are strong to, like chimpanzees they are.
Just watched Phelps win his 9th career gold medal in the 200m freestyle; breaking the world record just for good measure. The only two Americans to ever win that many golds were two randoms named Carl Lewis and Mark Spitz. Whoever they are. I mean, who watches the Olympics anyways, right?
Posted by: shank at
09:28 PM
| Comments (2)
| Add Comment
Post contains 252 words, total size 1 kb.
August 06, 2008
I thought that was weird, then I noticed he had shaved legs.
I thought that was weird too. Then I noticed he was the spitting image of Dee Snider; and I was like 'WTF!?'.
Posted by: shank at
07:50 AM
| Comments (2)
| Add Comment
Post contains 52 words, total size 1 kb.
August 04, 2008
For anyone reading this who may have actually come here looking for real tips on how to survive a hurricane: 1. You're absolutely fucked. 2. I would provide a link, but I'm a Darwinian and if this page is all you could dig up on the web; then your genes must perish for the sake of the herd.
Granted, the storm De's currently referring to is a mere blip on the screen. The only thing she really needs to do is get a party hat on and head down to the corner bar. But I figured I might as well put up a good surivial list that will help you get through most any medium term power outage. Anything beyond a week or more, and your best bet is to hunker down with some ammo and await fixed wing and artillery support.
Without further ado, the Hurricane Survival Kit:
1. Beer, ice, and water. There's no point in stockpiling liquor, as you won't want to waste ice keeping mixers cool. Just a giant cooler or four filled with these three key ingredients. The beer is for survival, and the water and ice are to keep it cold. Warm beer is a recipe for depression, and we all know that survival requires a Positive Mental Attitude.
2. Toilet Paper. Pretty self explanatory. Shit-covered hands are no good at helping you drink beer.
3. For food, you're going to need to stick to canned goods and things you can grill; which means you'll need a can opener and some propane/charcoal/firewood. I suggest a mix of both propane and firewood; because of the entertainment value of a roaring fire. Especially when it's on someone else.
4. Which brings me to the last item you'll need: a few other people, I recommend good friends.
Some people have suggested including boardgames and the like. I have to respectfully disagree, and here's why. The only kind of person who's going to include a boardgame on their survival list is a hopeless fucking dork. Which is not to say we're trying to rule them out of your group of friends, Lord knows we've all got a dorky friend or two. You're just going to have to ask them not to bring the game. You see, these are the kind of people who will bring some nerdy game that they love, but which everyone else is kind of 'Meh' about. Like say, Risk. Of course, everyone else in the group will play a round or two of the game; but when Dorky McLosernut's beer supply begins to run low (and everyone knows goddamn well that he only brought good beer because he knew it would grease the wheels of a thirty-fucking-six hour Risk marathon); resentment will set in. Discord is a real pain in the ass in survival situations, because it usually results in killing. Killing is serious business, and you're not going to have the right tools in a survival situation to cover your tracks properly. If you want to have a form of amusement (besides fire, nature's television) I would recommend something like horseshoes, bocci ball, or the like. They're entertaining, but mindless enough to keep people from wanting to gut each other.
If you've got other neccesities that you'd recommend go ahead and share.
Posted by: shank at
02:29 PM
| Comments (9)
| Add Comment
Post contains 595 words, total size 3 kb.
August 01, 2008
Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) and the Democrats adjourned the House and turned off the lights and killed the microphones, but Republicans are still on the floor talking gas prices.......GOP leaders opposed the motion to adjourn the House, arguing that Pelosi's refusal to schedule a vote allowing offshore drilling is hurting the American economy...
...Democratic aides were furious at the GOP stunt, and reporters were kicked out of the Speaker's Lobby, the space next to the House floor where they normally interview lawmakers....
...Republican leaders just sent out a notice looking for a bullhorn and leadership aides are trying to corral all the members who are still in town to come speak on the floor and sustain this one-sided debate....
...Update 4 - The scene on the floor is kind of crazy. Normally, members are not allowed to speak directly to the visitor galleries, or visitors are prohibited from cheering. But in this case, the members are walking up and down on the floor during their speeches, standing on cheers, the visitors are cheering loudly. Some members even brought in visitors, who are now sitting on the House floor in the seats normally filled by lawmakers, cheering and clapping. Very funny.
Democrats faced a choice here - should they leave the cameras on and let Republicans rip Pelosi & Co. on C-Span, or should they leave the cameras off and let the Republicans have their "tantrum," as one Democratic aide characterized it, with the cameras off. So the cameras are off, but Republicans, and the crowd, are clearly enjoying the scene...
I'm a little surprised that the Democrats have decided to die on this hill. This is something that a surprising majority (70-75%, depending on your poll of choice) of people support. Now they look like selfish, do-nothing's who won't represent their constituents. Hmm.
You know, the more I think about this, the more I find it irritating that the Democrats have basically walked out on the people. It shouldn't matter what side of the aisle you're on, when 70% of American's want a ban on offshore drilling lifted, it should get at least a voting opportunity. I mean, come the fuck on, people! I hope the Republicans make a huge scene about this. They're finally speaking for the vast majority of Americans, on an issue that is central to all of us.
Update, from the same article:
Update 6 - Rep Devin Nunes (R-Calif.) just pretended to be a Democrat. He stood on the other side of the chaber and listed all of the GOP bills that the Dems killed.He then said "I am a Democrat and here is my energy plan" and he held up a picture of an old VW Bug with a sail attached to it. He paraded around he house floor with the sign while the crowd cheered.
I can't believe no one's getting this on video.
Posted by: shank at
12:30 PM
| Comments (2)
| Add Comment
Post contains 489 words, total size 3 kb.
I mean, I know I went to sleep in my damn bed. The only time I got out of bed was shortly before I fell asleep. The Wife was working the night shift, so I jumped up to check the locks and what not, and returned to bed. I mean, I'm sure I got back in bed. Why wouldn't I return to bed? Why would I get up, check the locks, and go sleep on the couch? And if I did, wouldn't I remember doing that?
That shit is weird, bro. I've never been known to be a sleep-walker; but that's not what worries me. If I did, in fact, get up in the middle of the night and walk out to the couch to sleep, what the fuck else did I do?
What if I walked around the yard once or twice? What do you think the neighbors would think of that shit? Their redneckass neighbor wandering the streets in the middle of the night, wearing his boxers and a smile. What if I'd have left the fridge open, or the stove on? I mean, I'm goddamn lucky I didn't kill myself or destroy something.
Maybe I should have The Wife chain me up each night, like they shackle werewolves and stuff in the movies; so that I don't end up a menace. Then they'd have no choice but to put me down; and we can't be havin' that shizzle my nizzle.
Posted by: shank at
09:36 AM
| Comments (8)
| Add Comment
Post contains 286 words, total size 1 kb.
July 29, 2008
I wonder how that convo would go:
shank is at home, watching TV and eating a bag of microwave popcorn on the couch. A phone rings.shank: Yalla'.
De (static, screams, crashes in the background): SHANK!? IS THAT YOU?
shank(pulls phone away from ear, grimacing): Jesus Christ. Yeah? Who the hell is this?
De (continued static, glass breaking, sirens. The connection cuts in and out): THI- IS DE. -OOK, I'M IN A BIT -- A SPOT, -ERE. I NE-D -OME ADVICE ON -OW -- SURVIVE AN APOCALYPSE.
shank: Well, first things first. Do you have any personal lubricant?
De (white noise continues, thunder claps can be heard, horns honk): I'M -ORRY, BUT -ID YOU JU-- SAY '-ERSONA- LUBR--ANT'!?
shank: Yep! Make sure you've got a good supply on hand, as it were, so that you've got something to do when the power goes out and eternity sets in. If you make it past the four horsemen and what not. What's going on down there?
De (background noise reaches a crescendo, waves can be heard crashing, donkeys braying): WELL, IT -EEMS THAT THE END IS NIGH. THERE'S THIS -EVEN HEADED --ING MAKING ITS WA- THROU-- TOWN FROM -HE OCEA-. WHAT --OULD I -O?
shank: Um. How flexible are you?
De (wind roaring, dogs barking, cattle lowing): WHAT!?
shank: Flexible! How FLEXIBLE are you?
De (the sound of fast footsteps, muffled distortions, chickens being put in a blender): I'M -KAY, I GUESS.
shank: Good! All you need to do is bend over and kiss your ass goodbye!
shank (Hangs up the phone, and shovels a fistful of popcorn at his gaping maw.): Bitches always on my jock, yo. Can't even peep a movie up in this motherfucker.
Posted by: shank at
11:28 AM
| Comments (5)
| Add Comment
Post contains 349 words, total size 2 kb.
July 24, 2008
I really empathize with her though, because I too have a name that's embarrassing; which is why I go by shank in the blogosphere. My real name is actually Richard Cocking. There I said it in front of you all, my real name.
Posted by: shank at
06:56 AM
| Comments (2)
| Add Comment
Post contains 69 words, total size 1 kb.
102 queries taking 0.2204 seconds, 540 records returned.
Powered by Minx 1.1.6c-pink.
